"We Grow Accustomed to the Dark"

We grow accustomed to the Dark -
When light is put away -
As when the Neighbor holds the Lamp
To witness her Goodbye -

A Moment - We uncertain step
For newness of the night -
Then - fit our Vision to the Dark -
And meet the Road - erect -

And so of larger - Darknesses -
Those Evenings of the Brain -
When not a Moon disclose a sign -
Or Star - come out - within -

The Bravest - grope a little -
And sometimes hit a Tree
Directly in the Forehead -
But as they learn to see -

Either the Darkness alters -
Or something in the sight
Adjusts itself to Midnight -
And Life steps almost straight.

 

            It is speculated that Emily Dickenson suffered from an anxiety disorder called agoraphobia, which is a psychological disorder characterized by someone being unable to interact in society because of an extreme anxiety. This might filled her with panic and rendered her to live a secluded life. She wrote over a thousand poems, many of them reflecting about the deeper thoughts that plagued her during her years as a recluse. In her poem “We Grow Accustomed to the Dark”, Dickenson explores the difficult adaption to a lonely life by comparing her isolation to the darkness.

            In the poem, darkness, the loss of light, is symbolic of the emptiness the speaker feels when she loses her friendships. In the first stanza the speaker says “as when the Neighbor holds the Lamp/ To witness her Goodbye” to highlight the loss of her neighbor’s light in her life (lines 3-4). She attributes the light to the companionship of another person, and the loss of it to darkness. The “goodbye” experienced leaves the speaker feeling empty, without the “lamp” of her neighbor in her life.  The speaker’s eyes adjust to the darkness, allowing them to step “and meet the Road erect” (line 8). This symbolizes the transition into accepting that loneliness. The comparison of one’s eyes adjusting to the dark to the adjustment into isolation makes the process seem more bearable and possible. Perhaps Emily Dickinson was trying to convince herself that she could survive alone, a recluse from the rest of the world. The tone of the poem is gloomy yet almost hopeful in the last stanza as she writes that “Either the Darkness alters-/ Or something in the sight/Adjusts itself to Midnight-/ And Life steps almost straight” (17-20). This demonstrates her ability to cope with her distressing disorder. The adjustment to the lack of light shows how one can become habituated to any circumstance. While at first the lack of light may seem worrisome, eventually the darkness becomes the norm, and life adjusts to the new situation. This analogy compares with Emily Dickinson’s life and supposed disorder. If she was truly unable to leave her household because of her anxiety, then loneliness would have become her new norm,  her life adjusting to the lack of companionship.

            Dickinson uses the contrasting light and darkness throughout the poem to convey the effects of isolation. Light is commonly known to symbolize purity and goodness, enlightenment, and truth. Darkness on the other hand has a gloomier connotation, and is used to symbolize the unknown, evil, and hopeless. Dickenson uses a contrast between the two to explore how vital human relationships are to the soul. They are the lamps, stars, and moons that bring light into our lives. This is significant when examining Emily Dickinson’s life because she suffered a very lonely existence. If she truly did have agoraphobia, then it would explain her anguish at not being able to leave her household and interact with others. We can only hope that she truly became accustomed to the darkness, the loneliness, where she resided.